


chrysalism

by JulianAlbertsCat (AdhdBarryAllen)



Series: AllenbertWeek2017 [3]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Allenbert Week 2017, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Thunderstorms, ptsd maybe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-09-21 14:23:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9552698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdhdBarryAllen/pseuds/JulianAlbertsCat
Summary: chrysalism:n. the amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm, listening to waves of rain pattering against the roof like an argument upstairs, whose muffled words are unintelligible but whose crackling release of built-up tension you understand perfectly





	

**Author's Note:**

> Day 6, hurt/comfort.  
> I've had this one in the works for a while, I hope you like it! :)

_ The rain had started out gentle that morning, but as the day progressed, it raged into a full-blown thunderstorm. Julian and Barry ran all the way home, hand in hand, their umbrellas nearly being swept away. _

_ By the time they made it to the apartment, they were both positively drenched. Julian started some tea, while Barry fetched them a pile of warm clothes fresh from the dryer. _

_ “Can we drink this in the bedroom?” Barry asked. “And with blankets?” He shivered; he didn't have much tolerance for cold these days. _

_ Julian nodded, placing the teapot and cups on a tray. Barry was waiting for him on the bed, already wrapped in the majority of the blankets they owned. He looked absolutely adorable, Julian thought. Like a wet puppy. _

_ “You planning on sharing those?” He set the tray at the foot of their bed and crawled under the covers with his boyfriend. _

+++

It was a dark and stormy night.

Julian woke with a start, skin damp and breaths ragged. Immediately, Barry was at his side, hands running down Julian’s back in comfort. “Hey, hey you’re okay. It was just a dream,” He assured, voice hushed.

Count backwards from ten. Breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth. That was the routine. Slowly, Julian steadied his breathing.

“Did… Did I wake you?”

“No, I wasn’t getting much sleep to begin with,” Barry told him.

As the sleepy fog faded, he became aware of the storm raging outside. Ah, so that’s why Barry was awake. “Is it the lighting?” Julian asked, pulling his boyfriend close. Barry nods against his chest.

Thunder cracks outside, soon followed by a flash of light at the window. He feels Barry flinch against him and threads a soothing hand through his hair.

“I— Sorry, you’re the one who had a nightmare. I should be comforting _you._ ” He sighed. “ I don’t know why I’m still afraid of it anyways. The lightning _gave_ me these powers.”

“Getting hit by lightning is traumatic, love. It’s okay to still fear it.”

“I know, it’s just… Somehow, I love the rain but hate the lightning. It’s like a muffled conversation upstairs, like feet dancing on the roof… It’s just calming, you know? But the storm reminds me of  _ that night. _ ” He shivers at the memory.

Julian smiles softly. “Don’t listen to the lightning then, listen to the rain.”

Barry presses a kiss to Julian’s cheek. “You wanna tell me about it?”

Julian knew he meant his nightmare. He let out a shaky exhale, running his free hand through his hair. “It was… Savitar. Again. This time though, he had my family.” Barry expression was one of pure love and empathy. He knew what it was like, losing your loved ones in your dreams. “It’s not even like they  _ care _ about me, but I… I couldn't stand to see him hurt them.”

“Do you miss them?” Barry asked, bringing a hand up to cup Julian’s face. He thumbed at the tear falling slowly down Julian’s cheek.

Julian nodded. “Sometimes. Sometimes I call Emma’s mobile just to hear her voice. Mother still hasn’t disconnected it.” He let out a broken laugh. “I can’t believe it’s been nearly ten years since...” He could barely bring himself to complete that thought.

“You never really stop missing them, do you.”

He shakes his head. Barry’s lost people too, he remembers. His mother  _ and _ his father. Julian can barely manage his own losses, he can only imagine what it’s like for Barry. And yet, he makes it through nearly every day with a smile. Sometimes, it's what inspires Julian to go on.

“Somedays I think about what it would be like to forgive my mother.” He whispers it like it’s a secret. “She hasn’t bothered to call or write in  _ years _ . When we needed her, she  _ left _ , and our family… our family fell  _ apart _ . As if losing Emma wasn’t hard enough; I had to lose her too.”

“You don’t have to force yourself to forgive her, Jul,” Barry says. “Just know, I’m here for you whenever you’re ready to.”

There’s an unspoken  _ thank you _ ghosting his lips. He doesn’t need to say it, though; Barry already knows.

“I really like you, Barry Allen,” He says instead.

“I really like you too, Julian Albert,” Barry laughs.

Lightning flashes outside again, but this time, Barry doesn’t flinch. He grips Julian’s hand tight, and lets the pitter-patter of the rain lull them to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tungle!](http://adhd-barry-allen.tumblr.com)


End file.
